I can't sleep

I can't seem to sleep tonight. My brain is wore out, but it won't stop running either. We are having homecoming at our church tomorrow and I am going to have toget up in a couple of hours and cook, but I am still AWAKE. This has been a long week for us. We have had VBS all week and on top of that we have had water problems. Our well has been going dry for a couple of weeks now and Friday sometime some kind of pipe busted loose and needless to say what water we had in the well was gone by the time we got home for town Friday afternoon. We spent today bringing buckets of water from the barn to use to flush the toilets with and to wash dishes. Jeff finaly got it pumped back us this evening and we now have a little bit of running water. We are going to have to be very careful with it. We went to a birthday party today for a dear sweet friend of mine's son he turned 10 and we visited a little while after the party. We used to go to church together untill we left the church and then shortley after they left the church and went somewhere else also. They seem to like it where they are now, unfortunatley we are not happy where we are. After we left we went to my husbands church that all his family attends and where he grew up in untill we got married and then he moved his membership to the one where we got married and I attended, because it was closer and I already had jobs in the church. I really pushed him into joining because I wanted to get back to WORK. He really didn't want to but I kept nudging him to MAKE A DECISION. Well let me tell you how wrong I was. I assurped his authority and now we are paying the consiquences. Untill a few months ago I would never have thought about it before I read Debbi Pearls book "CREATED TO BE HIS HELP MEET" I thought I was the good Christian wife, but boy let me tell you that after 16 years of marriage I have been badly wrong and have been a Jezabel. I have on numerous occasions tried to be my husbands concious. I have argued and pouted and all this time that I thought it was him, alot of it was me not behaving and being in my proper place. God has put me here for him and not the other way around. We women have lost our focus. The new age movement has left us with broken homes with women raising their children all alone, because we have felt that we are always in the right and who needs a man. Well I am here to tell you that I need my husband. I used to be one of those women. There are no telling how many times I have threatend to leave my husband because of something silly. It frightens me now to think that the kids and I have come so close to me tearing our family apart because I always thought that I could do it all by my self and I didn't need him or that he was always miss treating us.

Thank You Jesus for nocking the scales from my eyes.